Construction is messy. Near where I live, in Kingston, Ontario, there’s a historic site at Fort Frontenac, where they are repairing a stone wall that is over a hundred years old. For now, it looks worse than it did, even though it may not have been structurally sound. I got thinking, aren’t we often like that? It looks good on the surface, but the foundation does not stand up.
This may be why so few people are willing to risk the mess and confusion of rebuilding and developing their character and abilities because of how they think it will look. “I can’t go back to school with all those 20 somethings, I would look ridiculous.” “I can’t take a course on my dart night, I would look like I was letting down the team.” “I can’t go to couples counseling because they might expect me to make changes in my behaviour or attitudes, that might undo the “real” me”. And trust me, I am also preaching to myself.
We should all look at going from the foundational, (what made us, right or wrong,) to the transformational, (what we want to become.) This process is unlikely unless you develop and hang onto a clear picture of what the better you looks like.
I recommend reading Wisdom Literature. (The writings your tribe use for encouragement and guidance.) Then find a Mentor or coach to help you be accountable and to cheerlead if appropriate. (I know it is a shameless plug, but it is what we do.) Then celebrate the small victories! The successful lunar landing could not have happened if no one got in the capsule. Remember, construction may be messy, but it is worth the work!
If you take this on let me know what develops, I would be interested.
Till we chat again,
Wayne
This post really resonates with me!
I am currently going through a renovation that was imposed on me by circumstances rather than by choice. (read about it here)
I find myself living alone for the first time since I got married 34 years ago, and it is quite an adjustment, both on an internal and external level.
I am finding it challenging but also exhilarating, and I’m moving forward with a positive attitude of wondering where this is going, instead of worrying over what is being left behind.
Thanks for this – it is reinforcing my forward movement!